...but the lows are so extreme the good seems fucking cheap.

This week has been tumultuous, at best. Arguably worse with both ups and downs.

I received news at the beginning of the week that my grandfather had passed away. We were never particularly close, but its still pretty terrible news to bear. Also, because my mom and I are close--and I knew it would be most difficult on her. Monday morning, I walked into the office at Deadline and my dispatcher let me know it would be his last week. He had just returned to Chicago from Boston, where he had been for the prior two weeks, due to his mother's passing. After 10 years at the company, he re-evaluated priorities and decided it was time to move back, and be closer to his family. I entirely respect his decision, especially this time of year, yet I still can't help but be a little selfish, and know I will miss him a whole lot--for his professionalism, superior dispatching skills, and just being an amazing person to chat with on the radio all day. My work experience is certainly going to be worlds different once he's gone.

I received some similarly terrible news this afternoon. All I want to say is: love your friends while they're here. I'm sure we've all felt the disconnect--the times when you're in a room of people and still feel entirely alone. I've been the fortunate enough in these times to have someone magically find the words to reassure me, demonstrate that I have truly wonderful people in my life and people who, for some reason or another, value me and bring me to realize its all worth it. Tell someone you typically would not explicitly share with, just how awesome you think they are. How glad you are to have them in your life. &hugs. a lot more hugs. you can never have enough hugs.

longest weekend, ever.

a long friday with pleasantly continuous work bulldozed forward with a 6pm meet up at the garage. we waited around and packed up a full cuttin' cruiser of 14 people to roll out to bloomingdale for the pre-cross hotel party. hotel party?! you ask. yes, hotel party, at the hilton.



cuttin crew members rented out 4 rooms: our room hosted nine people. bed bouncing and a realization the minibar was NOT to be messed with was immediately followed with a visit to the cave bar ($2 fat tires, in a cave with leopard print carpeting, woah.) to a necessary trip to the pool before it closed at 11pm. group cannonball jumps, splash wars, and getting pushed in too many times, accompanied by lots of talks from the hotels workers meant we were definitely made to leave at closing time. next step: the karaoke bar. kelly clarkson, george michael, and ODB kept our group dancing, and the wedding party that was also using the space, kept us fed. 2am bedtime meant nothing when a group member is escorted back to the room at 3am, alarms start going unanswered at 6am, and everyone is yelling by 7am. by 9am, room 354 was wide awake and ready to find coffee, lots of it. 9 people in claire's car and we made it to bentley's pancake house. our waitress blew phil's mind when he realized he could have pancakes, and potatoes, and eggs. oh man.

someone had already carried the couches to the top of the hill, giving us a prime spot. the races passed with lots of amplified heckling (see: don't give a microphone to augie until he puts on the bunny suit), beermosas, and sod hand ups. our group departed before the 4Bs, enabling us to arrive back in chicago before the sadie hawkin's ride. i arrived at the blue frog and was blown away by the sheer number of bikes. 81 couples showed up to ride and show off their style. i was worried with the immediate police presence at the beginning (who beelined it for korby. luckily he handled that well) and a short bout of rain and the hour late start time, but manifests were finally handed out--8 mandatory checkpoints, a handful of optional checkpoints, and 2 1/2 hours to ride--and the ride went off surprisingly smooth

allison, kyle and i handled the handlebar picture checkpoint. we photographed about 65 couples, and were able to see most of the riders in all their stylish attire/costumes. &we were well able to entertain ourselves with the dress-up attire.


link to set



the after party at the cobra was also well attended, but the lack of drink deals and randomized participation in open sprints led people trickling out early. i personally was exhausted due to the prior nights excursions; my lack of money and inebriation led me to cut out around 1am.

12 hours of sleep, big lebowski, lots of coffee, tj's shopping trip and bike repairs made up my sunday. hibernation time for the upcoming week of probable rain, overdue indeed.

maybe i'll actually be responsible.

so much time, so many big events. winter is around the corner and im almost ready to hunker down and cuddle up, in many ways. i'm in the midst of season 4 of the wire and simutaneously beginning mad men. chris and i both are receiving netflix coupled with a hankering to cultivate hometime hang outs, both within our house and between the burgeoning humboldt park neighborhood. chili nights have been a tuesday mainstay with rotating households, in addition to ali and kyles continuation of bbqs (despite not venturing outside for too much during them).
traveling has been high on my priority list, though sort of unrealized until recently. maybe it has in part been due to the many awesome travels ive experienced already this summer (nyc, boston, tokyo, and most recently philly) but the restless is worming in my mind-while money is often the issue, its going to have to happen (sf over winter break, portland for the westside, guatemala for cmwc, atlanta for nacccs, and some desire to check out nyc in the winter. best to keep up on those airfare wars.)
while october was bleak and could be, november has dawned sunny and crisp, a treat of actual fall instead of a straight leap into winter. i've tried to cobble together a bike for cyclocross season, but my trips to cyclocross have instead been beermosa and heckling filled rather than actual racing. this weekend promises a little of both--the cuttin' crew is hosting a hotel party at the hilton before the cyclocross race on saturday. i have been promised a borrowed bike and a chance to pre-ride the course to assuage my hesitant nerves, primarily due to my absence of dirt riding since, santa cruz really.
our trip to philly was pretty fantastic. i realize more and more how greatly i rely on other people for my happiness. while i enjoy my alone time, being in a non-stop group is amazing. departing on friday morning, we (jake, allison, scott and i) drove the 12 hours + 1 hour time change to arrive for a pre-party at tattoo mom's and followed by an after party at donovan/matty/magic's house, which happened to be where we were sleeping too. others had complaints--i just miss punk houses, so the holes in the walls, the 3 people also sleeping on the couch in the morning, and the sticky kitchen floor didn't particularly bother me. the pbr hangover did. the remainder of the chicago crew (claire, augie, nico, chris, and mike malone) woke us up at 7am when they arrived with a giant cuddle puddle and lots of delirious chatter. not being able to fall back asleep, we ventured out for coffee, bagels and bloody marys and spent the rest of the afternoon in style at rittenhouse square eating vegan philly cheese steaks and slow rolling in the surprising warm and sunny weather. more hanging out ensured back at the house and at 6pm, we headed to the race start. jeff was not only throwing "house party cat 2" but hosting the start and a checkpoint at his house, what a guy.



i wanted to actually ride rather than just party, so i found the straight edge kid.
we did some serious planning:


matty, mike and i stuck together for the whole race, cutting down narrow one ways, and dodging yells and horns. space wine, spoonfuls of peanut butter, a beer bong, jello shots, s'mores, and dice games later, we rolled in 7th, 8th and 9th. we went back to the kegger party and back to the kyber and then the after after party. oh philly knows how to do it. with a 3am return, we woke up for an amazing vegan brunch and headed out for the long drive back. so much driving, and more money than i intended (or should've) to spend, but totally worth it.
this trip also made me think a lot about allison and my arbitrary decision to move to chicago. how would've turned out had we chosen philly? matty and donovan said we would've hated them already (ha!) but there is something to be said about the much smaller, scene feeling of philly that is more akin to portland or santa cruz where i find chicago on par with los angeles or even new york in the numerous neighborhoods and sheer size of the city that invites completely different community. who knows, maybe i've just been introspective lately, but i really can't help to consider (too introspective on this, and far too many other points probably...) i always liked the off minor lyric, "who you are is not a function of where you are", with a personal interpretation of too many people who continue to move, searching for something that they lack and hoping to magically find it with distance. i've thought that to be true in the past, but lately i've definitely been meriting an opposing viewpoint-that where you live can still largely dictate the scenes you involve yourself in and the ideas that are thrown around. i didn't feel like that changed greatly when i moved from santa cruz to sf, but it definitely has changed with my move to chicago.

anyhow, enough of that, i still have plenty on my plate, and a lot of good people around me. the new house (we moved back in september to humboldt park--the commute's longer, but the neighborhoodly vibe is worth it) is much larger and pretty amazing.

NACCC mayhem

So, I know, it's been a full week since NACCCs, but you should try to hang out with SF and Philly for 72 hours and try to recover in less than a week.

My "weekend" began Tuesday morning with the departure of the R1 ride, a 230 mile ride from NYC to Boston split into 3 days. Arriving at 124th St, we piled our gear into the support vehicle and readied ourselves for the 110 miles that lay before Hartford, that night's destination. Expecting it to begin late, I rolled out scarfing down a granola bar having not eaten or had coffee that morning. The 16 person group remained together while leaving the city, but once outside city limits, the road bikes took off. Dave and I hung with Chas and his partner Liam until the Connecticut border. By 11am it was 90 degrees, I needed to stop for coffee and more calories. We made a quick stop at a local deli and answered tons of questions about our tour. And on again. The heat made a quick lunch inside an air conditioned deli necessary. We trucked on again, having seen a few more riders fly by the window. This pattern continued, passing and getting passed amid all the riders respective stops. A flat, some cramps, lots more Gatorade and bananas later, we managed to navigate our way into Hartford without getting lost, finishing 5th and 6th for the day.

Day 2 was shorter, but far more difficult. We again left as a group, and as soon as we reached the route, strung out quickly. I've become less sharp on my climbing skills, and far less able to spin like crazy on my track bike down the constant rollers Connecticut was throwing at us. This time we packed a lunch, but still made a break for iced coffee and air conditioning. Rolling out again, I was feeling pretty strong, but as hills kept coming, suddenly the last 10 miles became increasingly taxing. A quick stop for Powerade held me through, but I rode into Providence on a steady pace, with zero push left in my legs.

I expected to feel the soreness of the day prior while heading out on the last leg of our trip, but the flatness of our route and the idea of only 50 miles to Boston kept me going strong. Within the first few miles of being on our bikes, we were down poured on. For twenty minutes, we all became thoroughly soaked. And just as suddenly, it passed and within the next half hour, the sun came out. This leg took us mostly on highways and next to strip malls, which was a big departure from the hilly, but beautiful route of the day prior. With 10 miles left, we rode into tree-shaded wide roads, and knew we were getting close. At that point, we pushed it until we got into the city and promptly got ourselves lost. With a little too much directional help from a local (also accompanied by a history lesson) we were directed to the downtown and finally found our way into Winthrop Square, warmly welcome by the rest of our R1 crew and very friendly Boston locals. Luckily, the final day left me less wrecked than the ride to Providence and more ready from the coming weekend.
A huge thanks to Squid for organizing VeloCity and then immediately following it up with this awesome event. Great times.

The week prior to NACCCs, the organizers sent out a packet that included the checkpoints that would be included in the main race and the best routes to travel to and from each. The set up: riders are sent out in a staggered order, given one manifest to begin. Each manifest provided 5 pick ups, and only once a rider made the pick up, did they know where their package was going and how much it was worth. Riders only had to complete 4 of the drops on each manifest, but could complete all 5. At each drop, the checkpoint worker called in the pick or drop and had it verified by the "base". Once a manifest was completed, that manifest had to be returned to the "base" to receive their next manifest. Riders were allotted 4 hours to complete as many drops with the ultimate goal was to earn as much money (true work simulation, right?!) as possible. Under this model, you were able to watch the progress of all the riders live.
Now, Boston is confusing. Really confusing after living in a perfectly gridded Chicago, with the most matter of fact, clear addresses. Beginning Thursday night, riding from downtown to where we were staying in Jamaica Plain, I was trying to pay attention to street names and navigational clues. Saturday afternoon, a group of Chicago kids pre-rode many of the checkpoints with an attempt to form some semblance of a mental map to a city you've known for only three days. Still, I managed to cement my N-S-E-W bearings, and it seemed to help me out a lot.

Saturday at Track and Field event with Dave and Emily:

link to flickr set

Sunday morning, I had a 10am start time and nervously arrived at 9:30am. Two other people were there. The start was at a bizarre location and seemingly many kids had mixed up or got lost getting out to the start location. Around 10am, more and more participants started flowing in and by 10:15ish, the first heat of four of us were finally sent off. While doing last minute map checks, we were given a local tip on the fasted way downtown. Upon receiving our manifest, three of us had a downtown checkpoint, and took that tip that took us an off ramp north on the freeway shoulder that quickly (and safely) dropped us our right by our first pick up. From there, we all had different manifests and were sent in different directions. Myself, I headed up Beacon Hill, the front side. For the first hour, I still kept having to pull out my map from my jersey pocket and verify my directions. After that, it began flowing a lot smoother. I was second guessing myself all through the first manifest, completing a measly $6 run because it was super close. I had to haul all the way south to Jamaica Plain to drop and pick up. While headed back north, I suddenly decided again completing my 5th drop way out on the beach, even though it was worth $12. While heading back to base to return my manifest, I kept thinking I was going to be really frustrated later when I finished $6 down from someone because I had stupidly opted out of that drop. I headed back into base and was told I was the first one to complete my first manifest. "Well obviously," I thought, "I was in the first heat and only completed four. Onward, keep going."
As I went on, the manifests just kept making so much sense--only a couple times did I have to double back to complete a drop and both times, it was unavoidable as I was getting sent back from the pick up I had done. I waited out the long runs and usually got doubled up with something else going out to a far off pick up, or a drop at a nearby location. I kept running into people who were getting super lost, but I just kept taking the same routes I had already figured out. Even if they weren't the absolute fastest, they were large, main streets and I didn't need to look at my map anymore. As I came into the Chrome base for my third manifest, someone asked me how I was doing. I said I thought pretty well, I hadn't became seriously lost or forgot and pick/drop yet. She responded, "Hm, ok. I was told some girl from Chicago is in first." I had to respond, "Well, I'm the only female here from Chicago, so I guess that's me." Still, I was confused how they were figuring this out since I had started before everyone else. I thought there had to be some mistake and just kept pushing. It was hot and luckily most of the checkpoints were providing water and snacks. Last year, I had seriously bonked the second day and was determined not to do the same. Snacks and more water, check. Red Bull? Ugh, chug one or two if it's my only option. Luckily, I was getting juice and nicer granola bars than I buy for myself. Around my forth manifest, the dispatch program gummed up and we were forced to freeze across the board, where ever we were. Everyone was in stand still, which I actually relished-refilling my water, stretching, and double checking my routing. Fifteen minutes later, we were sent off again. I rocked my way up through Allston and was almost hit by someone else barreling out of the Puma driveway. Deep breath--even if you're doing well, it's worth nothing if you can't finish. I kept that in my head while working my way back through Cambridge. I was hearing yells for Chicago all over--we had loudly made our presence know in the earlier part of the weekend--and all this encouragement kept me going. I delivered my girl.dog.bike. package to the Freight checkpoint only for the worker to show me what I was delivering--a relish sandwich. I had already delivered a brick and a bag of dirt, ah the creativity.
On manifest six, I had to make the long haul through Back Bay and south to Jamaica Plain. Once down there, the systems froze again. Five of us were on standby, for almost a half hour. I replenished and finally just sat around (again, real work simulation, right?). I was realizing how this format, as much as speediness, focused on routing and patience for busting out the long runs, which I loved. After JP, my last stop to clean up was base. I rolled into base and Billy told me I was finished. Instead of the initial proposed 6 hours, they were going to cut it at 4 hours, and I had been riding for 5 at that point. Only my first five manifests ended up counting, but Billy was fairly certain I had taken it, since most people were also done, or close to finishing four hours at that point. I was honestly surprised, all along I kept expecting that it was all an oversight based on my early start. Yet at the four hour cut across the board, I had completed 23 drops earning $213, coming in 2nd, a fellow Chicagoian, Nico with 18 drops and $176. Chicago takes it!

All said and done, this NACCC was extremely different than the prior two years I have attended/participated--San Francisco and Chicago, both in format and in the attendees. The open course format garnered criticism prior to the event and effectively disabled Boston locals from participating, since they would have been given an unfair advantage and entirely deterred others from attending. Yet, without attempting to defend or promote the choices made in formatting the 2009 NACCCs, I do want to comment on--despite all early criticisms--how well the entire event went off. I was welcomed enthusiastically by all locals-a feeling shared by everyone else I was traveling with, there were plenty of events all weekend long, and no one was hurt the entire weekend. The main race was challenging, ambitious in execution (writing a whole software program? hell yeah.), and ultimately just a whole lot of fun. And while taken seriously, the undertone has always primarily revolved around bringing an awesome community from diverse locals together, and in that, a great event and weekend.

Pictures from the Independent Fabrications checkpoint:



CASEY!


MICHAEL!


CHASSY!


NICO (1st male!)


amazing STEVE


MIKE!


----------
yeah, it's been forever since i posted to this blog. i wrote the above for the cuttin crew blog and figured it should get cross posted.
other news: allison and i are moving at the end of the month. staying in chicago but looking in humboldt/logan area, with chris dilts! can't wait for xbox 360 and netflix on demand! and living with chris of course.
more later...

good friends helping you make bad decisions

last friday marked the opening of the new west town bikes (with the retail shop, ciclo urbano, in the front) the local co-op bike shop, with new digs on 2459 w division street. the new space is much larger, and what better way to celebrate than invite everyone over to drink and hang out? by the time i got there after work, the place was packed and there were a lot people there i've never seen before. now the weather's getting nicer, it's made me realize how much bigger chicago is, and how many more people i have to meet! christina came over from the messenger picnic and we all hung out until about 10, when they started kicking everyone out. a quick stop for burritos was in order, and then we made our way up to ali's for her housewarming. it was mellow, but really nice to see everyone.

Saturday, christina and i were being old ladies and stayed in until noon so we could listen to this american life and drink coffee (so good!) after some shopping and retrieving cursive tickets, we met up with amy and matt to talk about how we haven't hung out since high school and see what everyone was up to. it definitely struck me how despite our differences and different choices in life paths, the certain commonalities we have from shared past experiences creates a certain bond. We definetely still had a lot to talk about, catch up and hear about other peopl from high school.

so last week, cait got the fantastic idea we should have a good old fashioned sleepover: girls and gay boys only (which we later amended to: or boys that will get their nails painted and watch molly ringwald movies) complete with face masks, cosmo quizzes and watching clueless. so much girl talk, mixed in with gay politics and religion, as well as figuring out "what kind of cosmo girl are you?" (we were "ready to settle down"... um, or not?)


we woke up to a gorgeous morning and decided it was imperative to eat blueberry pancakes and drink screwdrivers on the porch. cait and jason have the most amazing backyard, so we got to watch scout and amos run around the yard while we sat in the sunshine with blossoms falling through the air and made summer plans. summer '09!


after a quick rooftop visit at cait's, christina and i headed opted for another roof, where russell provided us with a gourmet bloody mary spread (that turned out quite tasty!) and despite all the pressure to call in sick, i decided to leave by 2 in order to get to work.


so this is my last week at whole foods (tomorrow's my last day!) and they decided to send me off with 5 closing shifts in a row (which i sometimes hate) but this week, the weather was so perfect, that it was actually a total blessing in disguise. I got to enjoy late nights at simone's, afternoons at hot dougs, cinco de mayo on the twisted spoke rooftop, a long ride with emily and marie up the north branch trail and definitely not least, another extended stay on the handlebar patio. yesterday we got together 10-15 people and racked up a $225 tab in five hours on the patio. great group, so much talking and giggling and planning and yelling and the servers totally love us. (right?)

christina stuck around later and headed down to bar deville with the group, while i headed up north to meet up with some co-workers at baby matilda and later on, the oakwood. it was pretty mellow and by 1:30, i decided i needed to commence the trek back down damen and go straight to bed. christina actually got up in time to get to the track this morning. i stayed home and watched when harry met sally..... oh, motivation. where are you?

up next! cursive, james brown dance party with vegan cupcakes, and dress up night with the ladies. hot damn!

in passing

this isn't super post worthy, i just liked it.

i'm currently halfway through reading middlesex, i happened upon this line:

"emotions, in my experience aren't covered by single words. I don't believe in "sadness", "joy", or "regret". Maybe the best proof that they language is patriarchal is that is over simplifies feeling. I'd like to have at my disposal complicated hybrid emotions, Germanic traincar constructions, like, say, "the happiness that attends disaster." Or: "the disappointment of sleeping with one's fantasy"...I've never had the right words to describe my life..."

i've definitely heard this sentiment expressed in a variety of college courses, and emphatically felt it applied to my own life. so it's always nice when your dictionary.com word of the day, not only breaks down the limited ways to wholly describe feelings/emotions, but one i feel could certainly be applied to my own mannerisms

risible \RIZ-uh-buhl\, adjective:

1. Capable of laughing; disposed to laugh.
2. Exciting or provoking laughter; worthy of laughter; laughable; amusing.
3. Relating to, connected with, or used in laughter; as, "risible muscles."

and really, this coupled with my seeming difficulty in completing the daily redeye crossword recently, and being owned in scrabble at our archie's game night on wednesday, i just need work on continuing to expand my vocabulary. hell yeah.

[and, it's been a good week last week. speed summary from saturday: bits of rain, lots of watching of carnivale, basement shows and dance parties and friends to share screw top bottles of wine with. too much more rain, a free m ward invite, complete with complementary soymilk, carrots, fruit and salsa. shlitz at the blind robin despite a downpour, dancing at danny's to smith's+ blondie +new order on a tuesday, 1/2 price whisky at twisted spoke for week two with brian followed by the aforementioned archie's game night, and rounding it up last night at handlebar with ruby + cait+ jason amid sleepover plans, internet shit talking, and the like. big weekend plans, full speed ahead. i'm starting to see the amazingness of chicago in the springtime!)

it's been a while

tax time has come and gone (phew) and chicago's had a few seventy degree days recently. last friday afternoon was spent on the patio of the handlebar, drinking $4 three floyds and enjoying the sun in a tank top. yes, you heard me. it's coming, i can feel it. i picked the hippie blanket up (finally!) and then had a little skylark action after that, some throwing up action on my part (food poisoning maybe? i haven't been sick like that in ages) and an attempt for a show down in little village (ie getting to the house the minute disrobe ended their set) i've had a series of discussions now concerning a certain amount of disapointment in myself with my lack of involvement in the local music scene whatsoever recently, so when one of my co-workers josh started telling me he was having houseshows in bridgeport i got all sorts of excited. hopefully more will come this summer--it's definitely a part of my life i've been missing a lot out here in the midwest.

vegan potlucks have been going in full force and this past sunday, ruby pushed it to new limits: brunch with the children. The three adorable girls she nanny's came over with parents in tow, as well as ella and another little boy, miguel. Having 5 little ones totter around, as all the adults drank and ate and listened to music definitely made me sit back for a second and ponder the situation. it made me feel real old. in a good way, but definitely reflexive.

Work's been pretty good lately. about a week ago i had a really cute, blonde haired boy, probably about 4 or 5 sitting in the cart as i was helping his mother. i turn to look at him right as he's picking his nose and involuntarily start giggling (or course, right?) after typing something into the computer, i promptly turn back to see him very carefully wiping his boogers all over my belt and just start busting up along. i swear his mom saw the whole thing and never said a word. left quite quickly in fact. and just as i started to clean it, another person hurridely put her groceries down. i can't say i didn't try. Also, I've actually been hanging out with a few people from work and last week it offered me the opportunity to play whirlyball for the first time. Probably best described as an odd marriage of bumper cars, lacrosse and basketball, this definitely pulled me towards my youth, giggling as i was able to smashing in to co-workers. kind of a janky set-up, as we saw one worker get electorcuted on one court and were quickly ushered to another, but a fun new experience nonetheless.

Christina and I have been on pretty opposite schedules lately, but hopefully (maybe?) that will become mitigated come may 11th when i began my new position as a bicycle ambassador! i'm a little sad to be leaving whole foods (health care and all) but i can imagine how much more sad i would be to see all the beautiful days through a glass window instead of on the seat of a bicycle. i'm really looking forward being pushed to explore chicago more everyday, as well as becoming more active in the bike community in a completely different way. it's seasonal, so i have no idea what that means for me come september, but that's all part of the fun.... right?

anyhow, i'm sure there's more but i'm bad at this. and we all have facebook anyhow... i'll leave you with a few pictures from mmi. want to travel more! can't wait for boston!

mayhem, and then some.

i had some idiot in an elevator say today, "messengering in chicago? that's a tough job."
i shrugged, "yeah, it's fun though."
"well, you might not think messengering is as fun when you get hit by a taxi going 45 mph." *chuckle*
uh...seriously?
i stared at him for a second and could only reply, "well thanks, but i don't really appreciate your prophesying my getting hit." he continued on about a friend of his who had been hit while walking and how inevitable it was. fuck dude.
and then while running a light yesterday, a pedestrian ran at me, arms out and tried to grab/hit/something me. uh, if you couldn't reach me, i clearly wasn't close enough to you to be dangerous. some days are certainly harder than others.

this past weekend was MMI! after a really good day at work, jake and chris came over to pick allison and i up. prepared with snacks, we hit the road and arrived in mke, straight to the swinging door, a downtown bar where people just kept showing up. amid cheap beer deals and silly games, things got rowdy and we relocated to the uptowner, awash with underage girls and dance music, and way more chicago kids than i thought were coming up, totally rad. time passed quick between pitchers of blast, dumptruck knocking over four girls drinks simultaneously, allison almost getting chris dilts' in a fight with a crazy cokehead after sinking her almond square in his drink, phew. we finally headed back to brian's friend, steve's house, which was fortunately close. all four of us shared his enormous king-sized bed that did not even necessitate squishing.

saturday began with a late, long brunch at comet, and then finally making it over to registration at 2pm. the group finally moved to the "real start". when manifests were handed out, i actively searched out cooter, the one person i knew actually could navigate milwaukee. we figured out an nice four person group of me, drew, kremmin, and another chicago kid, joe. wind and hills, but no snow made for pleasant race weather, and we jammed through the first couple points. realizing the race was much longer than i originally though, our pace mellowed amid gatorade stops, push ups, crawling across rolling trains, and cruising through side streets of sketchy mke neighborhoods. we finally made it back to hi-hat despite many attempted holdups at the cookie/pbr/tire deflation checkpoint, and luckily arrived right before the sleet began. i was stoked enough on free sandwiches, but the after party really got going when they began giving out free pints of 3floyds. i ended up winning 2nd lady and some new knogs, a swerve hoodie, and some ugly cranks, awesome. results on a blog here. early starts at drinking too often means needing to call it a night early and luckily claire and augie had their shit together to go get cars and take care of us since 3-4 inches of snow had fallen since arriving at the bar four hours prior. we headed back to shea, sarah, and kremmin's but none of them were home yet, so we stayed warm with snacks and drinks in jake's car. their space ended up being totally awesome for eating lots of gross pizza, hanging out more and slowly all finding our way to bed.
the nine some odd of us headed out brunch at the palamino the following morning to meet up with the lost kids from the cuttin cruiser who hadn't made it into mke until late the night prior. directly after, our car headed back to chicago in a bizarre pseudo springtime winter wonderland. chris dilts' kept us all entertained with plenty of stories, so good. arriving home was immediately followed by naps and coffee and seinfeld.
(&hopefully chris will have pictures up soon, he got some really good ones, as always.)

sunday night was our last playoff game for indoor season. we lost but it was a super fun game, and against my better judgement, i went out for drinks with the team after. bad choices, but my whole soccer team just rules, so still good way to go out. rough plans for outdoor when spring *actually* comes, fingers crossed for finding more people to *actually* come out.

last wednesday night i rode down to calhumet to watch the races with a really good group, i forgot how much i missed group rides. 108th is real far south though so i was super glad when james offered me a ride down on thursday to ride in my first sanctioned race! i was kind of disappointing i didn't do better, but i think it gets me more excited to try it more and figure out strategy. a totally different scene, but i think one i will be excited to try out more of.

spring, where are you? so many signs: patio furniture on chicago sidewalks, walgreens sudden halt on glove sales, the "official" beginning of spring, but i'm not feeling it yet. shit, i can't wait...

I was happy in the haze of a drunken hour ...

its been a roller coaster past few weeks.

i switched companies, yes again, but hopefully it'll stick this time. i'm a proud full employee (finally!) of deadline. they've managed to still be busy, and finally having days filled with riding rather than completion of crossword puzzles and snacking is refreshing. working on open wave is a whole new experience and a lot of fun.

while the company is great, i've seemingly had more problems in buildings the past fews days than in the past few months. after almost getting kicked out of one building, and having a very upsetting runin at another, i'm trying to mellow. it's super difficult with newb security guards on power trips, intent on making you feel small and shitty, because they can.

tuesday. was. amazing. 73, awesome. shorts and a tshirt, oh fuck yeah. allison and i met for coffee after work and went to the harold washington for a story week feature on nelson algren, which was quite enjoyable with some really funny, intelligent readers. after, we hit up inner town pub to meet with kim, an awesome girl i had met at mike's the week before. it was somehow devoid of the st. patrick's day idiocy, which was exactly what i needed. i rode home in shorts at 11pm, i'm so giddy for summer.

wednesday i finally hit up the women's night at west town with emily and kim and some other nice ladies. tune up time and box wine made for a good night.




thursday night was messenger appreciation night at blue frog!

(hopefully chris dilts will put up some of his pictures from this soon...)

i know, duh, free beer and prizes are the key to any messenger's heart, but it was awesome to see so many kids come out, and everyone in such good spirits. big ups to augie for making this happen. there are still so many kids i see out everyday and rarely talk to, so it was awesome to have such a fun reason to finally kick it with a bunch of them. the downside was pbr drunk is never a good idea, and friday morning was rough for a variety of reasons.

friday night i saw marcello's band, new thrill parade play at ronny's, which was arguably the worst bar i've been to in chicago. i saw three different kids with acid washed jeans, honest. the show was fun though. goth resurgence? i hope so.

saturday was a late start, but upon trying to retrieve allison's balaclava from jeff perkins, i some how became involved in the skid test for the new gran compe colored tires for the next cog issue. saturday stuck it out in the high 60s, making it totally awesome to spend the day outdoors. lots of kids were out, the cuttin cruiser in full force. we laid down a rainbow of tracks, which i thought was the best part. i rarely skid nowadays, the novelty made it all the more entertaining.



caught up, i was late to meet marcello at the field museum. we took a walk instead and came back west for coffee. now both equipped with bikes, we hit up atomix and then after grabbing some bbq food, headed up to dumptruck and cooter's house. kicking it in the greenbelt on humbolt with good people felt like the best way to spend at spring saturday evening. a tipsy three on three soccer game developed and i proceeded to acquire a matching crack on the opposite side of my glasses, inevitable with me it seems. rowdy and awesome, indeed. we won(!) and wrapped it up, heading over to mike's for a bonfire. my night cap came early and marcello and i headed home rather than hit up jeff's prom party, bummer. bacci's pizza, less of a bummer.

today was a mellow day of coffee and cooking, yojimbo's and thrift store shopping, movies and naps and the smiths. our soccer game tonight we particularly intense, and i achieved the most brutal bruise



riding south on larabee a couple weeks ago into strong headwinds, i suddenly felt something hit my shoulder. i quickly looked around and up into the stupid face of some giggling 10 year old in a school bus. the little jerks proceeded to toss a couple more apple cores out the window until the bus pulled away. ha, i couldn't even believe it, pretty funny.

and some other things...

MMI next weekend!

my puppeteer is making me furious.

last thursday, despite the torrential downpour, allison and i headed up north to meet up with other chifg'ers at the green eye for ira's pub crawl. surprisingly, about 8 others also showed up. from there, we went north to the two way for boiler makers, relax for $1 schlitz, and wrapped it up at the metal shaker, an awesome bar that hosts all sorts of metal shows. deciding i couldn't let the rain thwart my plans proved best as i still had a great time.

allison traveled down to the north american handmade bike show in indianapolis on friday night with ben, chris and dana. since i had work until 6pm, i stuck around in chicago on friday to meet up with caitlin at the bikeart party at the flat iron, saw al's band play and then went with jake and claire up north for (another) allison's birthday. snacks and some silly charades-ish game kept the night awesome.

augie picked jake and me up saturday morning to drive to indianapolis. we arrived at the show in this huge convention center and overwhelmingly wandered around for the next few hours, staring at beautiful bikes and seeing far more people that i ever imagined would be there. the broakland kids had a booth, so we hung out there a lot with teddy ruckspin, chilling in the lounge chairs. allison, augie, jake, augie's LA friend ryan, and i went to pizza before heading over to this cool art-loft space (really similar to flat iron) to FINALLY see macaframa. i was super excited and despite most other people being pretty mellow, couldn't help myself from excessive hollering and cheering. i was really impressed with the final product and excited to yell for nate's fall, steveb, phil, and everyone else. the rowdiness all went downhill from there with a dance party with the montano kids boom box, drunken beer can (and bottle...) throwing, and an unfortunate move to a nearby bar where we were kicked out after a few hours. ha. luckily, we were able to stay at kyle and tj's hotel room and slowly recover the next morning while watching vegas vacation before heading out for brunch.


linked to andrew yoman's flickr set, with some of the least flattering pictures, ever.

eli, jason grove +montano, and stevie all came to stay in chicago that night before flying out on monday. it was awesome to just hang out, catch up, and half watch rad before deciding in finally needed to turn in for work.

this week we also went up to chris' house in roscoe village for vegan desert night. ate cupcakes, pretzels, home roasted coffee and other select beverages, best idea ever!
on wednesday, we held out monthly chi-mix-gear night at ruby's house. theme: ultimate break up mix, this time in mp3 form. good turn out and i came home with lots of new music already on my ipod. i've spent the past couple days making my way through playlists, awesome. theme for next month is body parts i believe. suggestions? this could be a good one.

book club was postponed to next week, though i made it halfway through the kundera book. i'm also mostly finished with xenocide, drawing the ender triology to a close for me. dorky or not, those books rule. i've been trying to catch up on netflix rather than holding onto them for weeks. o lucky man (5 hours, but surprisingly smooth) rosemary's baby (good, but totally weird), road to welville (funny, great cast) and i'm en route to ingmar berman's cries and whispers.

friday was free absinthe hour at the dark room followed by a couple hours at the cobra. imagine how that went...i spent a rainy saturday with jake, drinking coffee, cleaning, eating beets, more naps, watching 12monkeys and (always) more seinfeld. finally ventured out in the rain to see gino, who was in town for his birthday. bizarre party, but good to visit.
i'm hoping the torrential downpour is finally gone for a bit so getting to soccer isn't a drenching experience...

seven letter word for pilsen doorbell...

whew, its been some time.

[recap]
stuporbowl: evan and chas arrived in town wednesday night. we all went on ira's pub crawl thursday night, totally awesome. embarked for mpls on friday night for two days of absurdity. party bus, ran out of gas at 2am in the middle of no where. finally arrived in mpls at 6am and went back to sleep. brunched, "raced", and then hung out at the end. the real afterparty started when we got back to the rollerderby girls' house and they offered up their liquor cabniet, ridiculous, and totally awesome. we made it back to chicago after a super late brunch the following morning and lots of attempted sleeping on the bus amid many rest stops to ensure our gas didn't get too low.


(link to my flickr set)



(link to chris dilts' set)

being back in california was pretty great: we flew home first to spend time with the family. my older brother treated us to dinner at the restuarant he is currently managing. sheesh, far too respectable for me, but one of the best meals i've had recently. my mom drove us up to sf thursday night, and we stayed with jen and diego at their beautiful new house out in the sunset. sf was dissapointingly rainy for most of our stay, but the sun peeked out friday morning for our trip to atlas with a whole slew of good people. i spent the day stressing out, ironing out last minute details for the race. yummy dinner at jen and diego's, bender's for the friday the 13th alleycat afterparty, and quality time with taco, john blackwell's new puppy at wendy's house. saturday we pulled the race together and 90, yes 90! people came out. i guess i made it more difficult than intended because only 50 finished. still, i had a great time working a checkpoint and heckling. after party at chrome, dinner at golden era with the group, and a stop at gestalt and the uptown after. sunday, we woke up early to meet up with evan at four barrell before traveling to east bay for brunch at steveb's and then drove up to santa rosa to catch the tour of california. pro racers galore, gold sprints, and coffee filled attempts to escape the rain. ate lanesplitters back in oakland and then arrived back into sf to go to sweaterfunk (?!yeah huh?) night at the lepolounge, a weird bar in chinatown. monday was our last day spent getting bfast with noah and his new lady, dani, dave, and james at st francis, packing up and vietnamese sandwiches in dp. arriving back into chicago was actually really anticipated, and super easy despite our insane amounts of luggage, thanks to dave driving us to sfo and jake picking up on the other end.



cog held a one year anniversary party at av-aerie this past saturday. while i had already seen most of the displayed photos, tons of good people showed up and i had a total blast.


(dumptruck's flickr set)

av-aerie is just a totally rad space, and conviently only 8 blocks from my house. i went to see brian dewan, nana gringold, and music tapes there last night. i'm missing having motivation and friends who want to go to shows. i'll work on it.

we had our first meeting of book club last thursday. shit, i'm super excited to see this actually manifest after far too much idle talk. we chose milan kundera's the book of laughter and forgetting. we'll see how it actually flows.

restarted the next season of indoor soccer. i keep hurting myself but finally learned to just wear contacts. we won our game this past week picking up three awesome players since we were short that night. totally ruling.

i brought back a bike i had left at rigg st. and finally have three complete bikes built up: a work, track, and road bike. pictures to come soon cause i'm super proud of them. hopefully i'll get the last bike i have in working order and i'll be set for sometime.

now that february is wrapping up, i call total bullshit on everyone who told me february would be the worst, weatherwise. hrm, it's been a breeze compared to the average 13 degrees of january. i'm desperately awaiting daylight savings time though-working late just isn't as arduous when it's still light out.

today i was overjoyed. we were supposed to be hit with an ice storm that, instead, only sieged the bottom half of illinois. i, on the other hand, was able to work in the mild 18 degree, partly cloudy weather. motorists seemingly get most aggravated when following the horn, i give them the hand sweep, the "yes. you are behind me. go around, duh" motion. after that interaction today, this woman today rolled down her window and in the garbled speak you are only able to barely hear when someone speaks to you from inside a car, said (i only assume) that i was too far in the street for her to safely avoid me. i gleefully did what i haven't been able to do for weeks now, trapped in these silly lobster gloves, and flipped her. i don't normally condone these things, but there was something so absurd about being excited to be able use all five fingers. the weather does funny things to you.

on that same run i delivered these:

there were 500 of them-postcards that cost $225 for this cheesy clothing boutique, for which i'm sure i was payed $5 or something even though it was on armitage and sheffield. the woman called me hon, honey, and sweetie in the two minutes i was inside, classic. anyhow, when i told my dispatcher about my new-to-me front rack i put on my road bike it made her really happy. she's been giving me all the loop "car" runs, (which is actually often a client who doesn't believe a biker can carry anything more than an envelope...but i'm all about the small-ish boxes that pay me twice as much), which is super awesome since it's been pretty slow. due to the slowness, i've been up to update my monday only, to all-week crossword puzzle champion.

maniac randomly called me last week-him and joven had decided four days prior that they were to embark on a cross-country road trip, and that they would be in chicago on friday night. it was super funny to have them just show up-we ate at chicago diner, hung out at a show at jake's, watched mean girls in the morning and checked out some record stores. joven was determined to hate the cold while maniac made it a game to shovel snow. i'm a terrible tour guide, but they were only here for a day, so there wasn't too much showing around to do.

tour da chicago is well underway. the tour is a chicago tradition, i think this is the 8th year running. there are six or so races in the series, all with a slightly different theme. chicagoans apparently don't understand that alleycats should happen at noon though, so i slept through the prologue and and arduously dragged myself out of bed for the 8am start times the past two weeks. it's been fun to race again and have a reason to get people out. luckily it's been cold, pretty bitterly so, way too cold for snow. the dry cold i can deal with, the wet cold is the suck. anyhow, this past weekend was a lot of fun despite flatting out early on. val graciously hosted after, and sunday morning was filled with bagels and hot cider, yum.

my mom also made it out two weeks ago. she somehow came out when it was the coldest its been: hovering in the single to negative digits all week plus wind chill. still, we made it out and about everyday. thrift store shopping and dinners and took her out to bar deville one night to meet some friends. its great having a mom around to make you dinner again too, definitely awesome.

right now i'm loving free coffee mondays at mcdonalds. yes, mcdonalds. its gross, i shouldn't go, but when you want to be inside and mcdonalds is offering you a free warm beverage, i do not decline. this is mostly advertised in corporate elevators. maybe this is why they try to relegate us to freights...anyhow, maybe they don't know who they're really inviting in. (ir)regardless, its an added excuse to hang out in rock and roll mcdonalds. as if i need an excuse. also loving: the public library, pedestrian shields, chi-mix gear parties that turn into "nice-beer-drinking-at-chris'-apartment", new couches, and netflix.

i also felt that i should update because some big other events are coming up-stuporbowl is this weekend and chas and evan are coming in tomorrow evening to squeeze in some chicago time before minneapolis. things are pulling together for the valentine's day race and i'm looking forward to see all my bay area buddies.

crossing fingers for the 10 day weather report to be correct for once and it to be non-snowy and awful this weekend!

i've reached a new low..

i'm updating from the mac store on michigan ave. the ways i've been needing to spend standby is pretty absurd, too bad i find it altogether too entertaining. this morning was actually pretty busy, so i guess its not too bad.

after pining for thai food for weeks, my wants were finally fulfilled-we ate at dharma garden, an all veggie (plus some fish dishes, but you know..) restaurant up north. i order something i thought was going to have deep fried tofu that arrived with deep fried tofu, veggies and all, amazing.

other than that nothing too exciting. i am getting paged right now, byeee!

schadenfreude \SHOD-n-froy-duh\, noun

new years eve was pretty awesome. chris jensen showed up with a bike trailer full of champagne and two dominics worth of sparks (yuck), hilarious. we arrived early to a mellow gathering, which quickly changed as the apartment filled with "ski lodge" dressed friends and only escalated with ruby's nine hour dance mix. most everyone i wanted to see was there, plus lots of dancing and yummy snacks, pretty hard to NOT have a total blast. success indeed.



the following thursday was quite slow and thankfully filled with 2pm brunch and hours of batman the animated series, wrapped up with another movie and winter bike revamping. booyah. friday night was spent at colleen's playing 90s trivial pursuit and eating much pizza, yum. apparently i am not too much of a child of the 90s though, i can't even answer most of those questions, sheesh.

this weekend, i finally went ice skating! emily and simon were my happy accomplices, weaving our way through families and crush-ridden high schoolers. despite sore ankles and questioning my probable involvement in the destruction of a small child, it all ended well (and with no falls!) and was a lot of fun. after watching vh1 top 100 hard rock videos (yes!) at matt's, i attended a reading and screening of a couple shorts by animator jo dery at quimby's. i'm reminded how much i enjoy storytelling too, as it began with a fellow named walker mettling who read aloud from some collaborative 'zines he had compiled, in addition to a couple personally penned short stories. it also ignites the thought i might attempt some writing, something casual such as that is super appealing.

we won our soccer game on sunday! only the second win we've been able to pull off, but its been lighthearted all along. i didn't know many of the other players well before either, and its been a great way to interact, especially grabbing a couple drinks from our "sponsor" so close by makes the whole evening an awesome weekly outing. we only have one more game, followed by playoffs though. i'm feeling a drive to seek out other activities so my life isn't entirely consumed by working and casual hanging out.

sometime last week, jake and i finally made it out too "zoo lights" armed with hot chocolate and a need to view some animals. if it isn't self evident by the name, its the lincoln park zoo open at night and lit up by tons of holiday lights. again, i was surrounded by families and small children, but i was determined. the giraffes were awesome, the polar bear was no where to be found, but the best was the howler monkeys, displaying bizarrely human-like affection. really, all the monkeys ruled.



in other good news, 161 n clark ridded themselves of an extremely annoying messenger center. the security guard told me "the building figured you guys are busy and in a hurry and we might as well just let you guys do your thing." uh, fuck yeah. i only wish this was a group realization.
its been slow at work though, i've been finding better and more absurd ways to fill my standby time. daily crosswords puzzles and the discovery of the loop library's graphic novel section, in addition to elongating the list of spaces you will not be kicked out of.

ALSO, evan and chas are coming to visit at the end of january with plans to travel to mpls for the stupor bowl, which should be totally brutal and absurd. casey and travis and maybe some other sf kids are tentatively planning to make it out too, i'm super excited. mom is coming next week, and i believe gino will be around too. hooray for visitors, i need to begin thinking of all the places i need to take people when they come visit.

we began netflix too! any movie suggestions are welcomed.

as always, i'm bad at being succinct, the rambling comes too easy. and to those of you were luckily not the recipients of a more or less coherent text message, happy new year! if only i could remember to actually write 2009...

and ps. the weather has been fantastic. one 60 degree day last week melted all the snow and now it feels like a dream that the snow ever occurred. i know that'll probably change in two days, but i've been lovinggggg it.