maybe it's for the best. maybe it's not for anything.

I was waiting for pictures from the cocktail party, but they have yet to be edited, so I'll just post this from Wednesday. Pictures will come soon.

This weekend turned out pretty awesome. James lee arrived in town on Wednesday at the tailend of my work day and we were able to ride home together. Ate at the Handlebar and met up with Allison for some extensive Binny's shopping to prep for the cocktail party.
Thursday dawned rainy and gross. I left the house assuming northbrook would not be able to hold opening night. suddenly mid day, the skies cleared and i had to scramble to pull it together. luckily my dispatcher let me take off early and jamie stuck around to drive me and my bike plus allison, james, and jake down to the cruiser. A full bus with only 3 of us racing still turned out to be a lot of fun. Our first race was scratch race for just the 1/2/3 field which turned out to be only four women. For the miss and out and points race, they combined fields for a total of 11 making it a lot more fun. I managed to pull 3rd for all the races and just eek Francine out to make it for the final sprint of the miss and out. Just being out at the track and remembering why I enjoyed going weekly last year, I was and still am totally digging the vibe and community. Lots of good faces to see and I'm really excited about another season. Didn't arrive into Chicago until 11:30pm or so and was oh so ready to crash by then.
I finally found a dress on Friday after work, and came home just as Tori arrived into town! After getting settled, we met up with Allison, Chris, and Jake at Sultan's for falafel and byob on the patio. Vegan cupcake bake-off next, best idea ever. Showed up at the tail end when I don't think our votes counted for much, but still sampled four cupcakes, one of which was injected with whiskey. Way to go Margot! Stayed for a bit but headed over to Phil's later to hang out with him and Trippz on his back porch. I wish everyone had back porches. Summer needs to = less time in bars.
Saturday, chris, tori and i went down to the merchandise mart to check out the sample sale. everything was depressingly ugly and overpriced, definitely no real deals to be found. We all took a mid-afternoon break from cleaning up for the cocktail party to visit Neil. He was staying down by Rush after having a heart surgery of sorts (oouch!) and was back in Chicago to take care of it. Fantastic to see Neil--despite the circumstances, meet his lady friend and drink coffee and tea in the Marriott bar. Back at the apt, we all cleaned up and people started arriving around 9. We definitely had a full house by 11pm and then it began thinning out again around 1pm. But not before Erica and I encouraged the whole party to sing happy birthday to Kim and James! Happy Birthday you two! Not too much dance party action since I was so terribly unprepared on the ipod front (completely disappointing Erica and her DJing skills) but lots of awesome pictures and good times.



We had some unfortunate interactions with local drunk kids on our front porch (our condo neighbors must REALLY hate us now) and some overly drunken acquaintances, but overall, a lot of fun. Chris determined that people must begin leaving, and it finally happened around 3am. With some serious same night clean up, I was able to wake up the following morning without being entirely overwhelmed.
Sunday morning soccer was rough on my body, but we cleaned up 8-0! I always love it once I'm there, but the trek down to 29th and Western never sounds too fun. James, Tori and I visited allison at Upgrade afterward, and spent sometime at Jenni's for her garage sale/hang out. Picked up some food, and headed over to Dumptruck's, for what I hope is the first of many summer time blvd hangouts. Yes! I can't wait!
I don't know when i became such an awful prolific excuse maker. Its trying not to spread myself too thin (cause so often I underestimate the time it takes to be places and then end up bouncing around without ever being able to just stay put and enjoy myself) but sometimes I neglect things I should have made priority. I didn't make it up north for Kim's birthday festivities due to a raging headache and in-town friends who didn't seem interested. Still, the following morning I thought about how bummed I would be if similar friends just decided not to come to my birthday. Priorities, I need them.

Monday and tuesday were 60s and gloomy. People keep asking me when the weather is going to break. I wish I knew Some woman walked outside the other day and turned to her friend, "Oh, is it raining?" You're outside? Maybe I need to stop being such a jerk about the intelligence of the general populace, but some people make it real difficult for me to feel otherwise. In the past three days i have had 4 people almost turn into me on one way streets. One was filing her nails. On Sunday night, there was a cop driving south on Rockwell.

Tori leaves town tomorrow, but James is sticking around for another week or so. Noah comes to visit in another week and then off to PDX! It's the feeling of not doing much, but somehow always staying occupied. I think once I'm back from portland, I might need hibernate for a week or so...

a better version of me.

for some reason may weather has taken a turn for the worse. its supposed to be april showers bring may flowers, right?! but chillier temperatures and some rain it is, and i'm taking to with lots of episodes of six feet under and xfiles. though i'm probably just using the rain as another convenient excuse to not be training. track season starts tomorrow (as long as the rain holds!) and i only finally glued my tubular tires this morning. my fingers aren't too happy with acetone and too much 3M glue, but i am oh so pleased to be able to cross that off my list.

last weekend allison, nikki, jake, trippz, casey, olive, and i rode down to the indiana dunes! after so much talk of making the trip last year and never actualizing, i was determined even after eric backed out (too cold? boo!) we left saturday morning after coffee at lovely and waiting for trippz. met up with casey and olive down south and headed out. since none of us had been, there was a lot of stopping to consult maps and reconsider routes, but we embarked on the longer route via mostly greenways. the trails were awesome and completely worth it. wooden bridges and overhanging trees. stirred something within me. i complain about the sprawling, and intensely urban layout of chicago, yet haven't sought out surrounding areas that counter it.
i was pretty impressed that areas of indiana were that beautiful.



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5 hours, and lots of snacks later, we arrived at the national campsite and met up with mike and eva. after setting up camp, we rode down to the beach and into michigan city, settling on the first restaurant we found. luckily, it was an awesome brewery with really good beer and pretty decent food, and butcher paper tablecloths you could draw on! back to the site for campfires and mad dog and yelling and cooking.


luckily there was close to no one else in the campsite except the two small children that threatened jake with their sticks when we walked down to the dune mart for coffee the next morning. sunday was sunny and awesome, so after we made breakfast and packed up, we headed down to the dunes.





Waited for the rest of the crew to pack up and finally left at 2pm. due to our late departure, we took the shorter route along the lake and through gary. staying entirely on highways, cut our travel time by half, but led us through some of the most depressing scenery i've ever seen. our routing led us to a stopped train, which someone proclaimed "beer time!"



a perfect break actually, and 20 minutes later, the train finally was out of our way. we arrived back in chicago to an awesome dinner and cheap beers and simone's. pleasantly exhausted, i fell asleep at 9:30pm, yes. excited to plan another similar trip sometime in june. and to cross that off the list of things i need to do in 2010!

i still have so much to learn about being a real adult. i too often entertain the idea that since i'm on my own and making a living (enough to get by at least) that i'm mature in other ways, but in light of other realizations, i'm pretty certain that theory is entirely null. i've too often only surrounded myself with people i really like and other than that, i don't know how to deal/talk to people that i don't like or don't really want to hang out with. more, i need to watch the gossip i say to other people (especially who it is said to...). in small communities, word passes around quick, usually quicker when you don't want it to. and more, considering how emotional i become once drinking, i need to be careful the things i tell other people. so it goes.